Over the years I have come across a number of people who seemed to think they could basically say just about anything, so long as they followed it up with the words "no offense" or "just kidding."

"No offense but, you really need to lose some weight."

"No offense but, I've seen animals on David Letterman with better freethrow averages."

"No offense but, you're just not as smart as so-and-so."

You can get away with this when you are a kid, for the most part, because people don't expect you to have much in the way of discernment. It's perfectly acceptable for a kid to mistake a fat woman for a pregnant one or to be unable to avoid mentioning the hideously Marv-like toupee on a man's head.

I swear that the Internet has taken this concept and gone cancerous with it.

Now we are all anonymous. We can say whatever the hell we want and don't have to take responsibility for it.

Am I the only person left that's willing to give an accurate and honest profile AND stand by their own ideas and opinions? I've noticed that usually people online are doing one OR the other OR neither.

Thankfully, dA has facilitated the public's passive-aggression by arming them with emoticons.

That way you can insult someone and pretend you don't really know what you're saying, but just asking an innocent question.

"You think so? That's not what I heard..."

(translation -I don't agree with you, so I'm going to call you an idiot, but covertly)

Or

"Oh, I see now"

(translation -I still don't get what you're trying to say, so I'm going to pretend that it's because of your inability to make your point)

Or pretty much any combination of words and this... because it implies that the person using it is helpless and at the mercy of the world around them.

Because now it isn't really you speaking, but the little smiley face instead, and who can get mad at a smiley face? But just so you know, if they DO get mad, well then it's their fault and not yours. Afterall, you used a smiley, right?

And if the smiley defense doesn't work, be sure to accuse them of not being able to understand humor or sarcasm. After all, nobody is as funny as you are and if they can't appreciate your urbane wit, then they just don't deserve to breathe the same air as you.